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Narcissists in Divorce

Updated: Dec 9, 2021

Narcissistic Abuse needs more exposure and often gets ignored or misunderstood. Sending all those affected by Narcissistic Abuse the strength to heal and thrive. It was a pleasure to be invited to speak on a series of podcasts with Dr. Supriya McKenna and top UK lawyer Karin Walker.

Part One

I explain why it's so important to be able to recognise (as a victim of a narcissistic relationship) your own telltale gut feelings and responses. We discuss how the narcissist is able to show you your own wounds, and how it is that narcissistic abuse is so infrequently recognised, even within the area of domestic abuse - and why that matters.

Part Two

We discuss why it is that NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) is not well recognised in the UK and why mental health professional and lawyers are not being trained in NPD. We talk about the issue of the family members of narcissists 'diagnosing' the narcissists and why getting a formal diagnosis of narcissism is unlikely to be helpful. I explain why it is unhelpful for victims of narcissistic abuse to 'name and shame' the narcissist in their lives, and why it is that a narcissist will attempt to annihilate their spouse in divorce. We also discuss the narcissist's need to collect objects or continually have new fads in order to gain narcissistic supply from others.

Part 3

We discuss the ins and outs of 'complex PTSD' - a consequence of narcissistic abuse. I explain what treatments are available, including EMDR (eye movement desensitisation and reprogramming) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. They talk about how Mindfulness Meditation is a excellent way for the victims of narcissistic abuse to rewire their brains, and how it is scientifically validated. I also explain why it is that seeking therapy with a therapist who does not fully understand NPD may make things worse, and how it is that the narcissist has the potential to be your greatest teacher when it comes to healing your wounds to lead you towards personal growth and happiness.

Part 4

We discuss how common Narcissistic Personality Disorder is in the population, and why it might be on the increase. We also talk about whether Narcissism is more prevalent in certain cultures and whether Narcissists can be 'cured' of their NPD. I caution how some narcissists use therapy as a means to learn how to change their behaviour in order to escape detection. Finally, we discuss the tricky concept of whether narcissists are able to experience love.


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